Breathe. You are enough.

I love Oprah. I love the topic of spiritual development. I devour books on living my highest self. But the more I speak to women around the world, the more I find myself wondering:

Are we being peer pressured into questioning our lives?

“Find yourself,” “Live your purpose,” “Go on the quest and search for your divine destiny.”

That’s great advice, and you should absolutely ask yourself the tough questions. Ask yourself “Am I happy? Am I truly happy with what I have and where I am?” But here’s the thing- its OK if the answer to that is “yes!”

Sometimes I worry that the heightened conversation about “purpose” tricks us into thinking we shouldn’t be content and causes us to dismiss the value of our current reality. Sure, there are women every where with big dreams and secret rooms in their soul that house their dual purpose. Notice I said “dual” not “greater.”

breatheI just want to tell you that you are enough. There seems to be a warped perception about “purpose” going on; one that says if you don’t feel pulled to go on an Eat,Pray, Love type of quest that you must be missing something. It’s tricked us into thinking that we shouldn’t be content. Ask yourself the tough questions. at least ASK. But if you never feel pulled to do anything other than love your kids, that’s enough. If you never feel pulled to do anything beyond entertaining your friends and enjoying your Sundays, that’s enough. You don’t need to be the hero to millions to be the hero of your own story. You are enough. We stop waiting for life to be extraordinary when we realize that every moment, no matter how simple or cliche, has within it the potential to be extraordinary. Every moment possesses remarkable qualities. We just have to look for them.

Whether you are climbing Everest, sitting next to Oprah, answering the phone at a local business or cooking dinner for your kids in your small suburban town, you are heroic. You’ve won, you’ve lost, you’ve learned and grown and soared. You’ve fallen and you’ve risen. You’ve felt deep recesses of pain and overflowing multitudes of love. There is an epic novel in and around our every day lives. Each of us is living a masterpiece, one that is full of raw and beautiful moments, ups and downs, adventures and obstacles, quiet victories and huge love.

If you feel called to a dual purpose, honor it, plan for it. But if you turn inward and find that you are indeed content with what you have, celebrate that. Embrace the incomparable nobility of being the best version of yourself in the life you are currently living.

You. Are. Enough.

The List That’s Changing Lives – The Books That The Gurus Are Reading!

Lady readingI’m a TOTAL book addict. I geek out on books. I have books taking over every room in my house. My heart and soul and story are wrapped around the books I’ve read and the ones I am writing. My first love is the written word. (In fact I had this “shot out of bed at 3am” lightbulb moment the other night in which I realized I had to build something new around my love of writing! So stay tuned! The muse has spoken!)

A lot of my friends are teachers of spirituality, abundance and success. As I see them soaring and manifesting all sorts of great things, I decided to ask them what books changed their lives. I wanted to know the words that were soul shifting and life changing for them. I wanted to know what books woke them up and brought them home. Below are their answers! This is THE list of books that are being read and embodied by the top experts in the spirituality and success industry.

May these words that have guided and expanded the brightest minds in the biz, do the same for you. =)

  1. The Gifts of Imperfectionby Brene Brown
  2. Rich Dad Poor Dad by Robert Kiyosaki
  3. A Million Miles In A Thousand Years by Donald Miller
  4. A Return To Loveby Marianne Williamson
  5. The Power of Your Subconscious Mind” by Dr. Joseph Murphy
  6. Creative Visualization by Shakti Gawain
  7. The Four Agreements by Don Miguel Ruiz
  8. The Alchemist by Paulo Coelho
  9. The Gift by Hafiz
  10. The Fire Starter Sessions by Danielle LaPorte
  11. Falling Into Grace by Adyashanti
  12. The Untethered Soul by Michael Singer
  13. The Seat of the Soul by Gary Zukav
  14. The Game of Life and How to Play it by Florence Scovel Shinn
  15. The Way of the Peaceful Warrior by Dan Millman
  16. Daring Greatly by Brene Brown
  17. Awaken the Giant Within by Tony Robbins
  18. Think and Grow Rich by Napoleon Hill
  19. The Power of Now by Eckhart Tolle
  20. Wishes Fulfilled by Wayne Dyer

Many of the books on this list changed MY life. And the ones I haven’t read yet are going on my Christmas list. The power of transformation is available to all of us. And sometimes, all it takes are the right words at the right time for the blessings in life to beautifully, powerfully unfold for you.

Happy reading!

Get A Little Naked

Find your truth, then live it

There’s something beautiful that happens when you stop hiding. When you can finally shed all of the things that aren’t really you and step into all of the weird and wonderful things that ARE, something shifts. Changes happen.

You like yourself. It’s scary at first, but then you feel empowered. People are attracted to your authenticity. Opportunities that were meant for the REAL you start flowing into your awareness. You might lose a few people, but the ones you gain feel divinely connected. Here are just a few of my favorite quotes on the beauty of stepping into your truth, embracing it and shouting it until your voice cracks. 😉

“Owning our story can be hard but not nearly as difficult as spending our lives running from it. Embracing our vulnerabilities is risky but not nearly as dangerous as giving up on love and belonging and joy—the experiences that make us the most vulnerable. Only when we are brave enough to explore the darkness will we discover the infinite power of our light.”
― Brené Brown

“All stories have a curious and even dangerous power. They are manifestations of truth — yours and mine. And truth is all at once the most wonderful yet terrifying thing in the world, which makes it nearly impossible to handle. It is such a great responsibility that it’s best not to tell a story at all unless you know you can do it right. You must be very careful, or without knowing it you can change the world.”
― Vera Nazarian

“When we were children, we used to think that when we were grown-up we would no longer be vulnerable. But to grow up is to accept vulnerability… To be alive is to be vulnerable.”
― Madeleine L’Engle

“Real dishes break. That’s how you know they’re real.”
― Marty Rubin

Because true belonging only happens when we present our authentic, imperfect selves to the world, our sense of belonging can never be greater than our level of self-acceptance.”
― Brené Brown

“Live authentically. Why would you continue to compromise something that’s beautiful to create something that is fake?”
― Steve Maraboli

“As you become more aligned with the truth of who you are, the question of liking yourself goes away. It is a natural state of being.”
― Rachel Archelaus

“Often misconstrued, authenticity is not about being an open book, revealing every detail of yourself without rhyme or reason. It is simply the act of openly and courageously seeing what needs to be seen, saying what needs to be said, doing what needs to be done, and becoming that which you are intent on being.”
― Scott Edmund Miller

“High above the noise and fear mongering of critics and cynics softly speaks your true self.”
― Mollie Marti

“In the beginning, it is difficult and even painful to see the faults in yourself, the flaws in your soul, the error of your ways. But I have come to love the moments when I see my flaws and I spot my errors! It is one of the most beautiful things, really! Because it is when we see our own flaws and our own errors that we can find the opposite of those things! It is when we see our own flaws and our own errors that we can see that there is so much more room to become better! And so I have come to actually rejoice when I find something wrong with me! And I know when it’s really wrong because I can see it and I can feel it in my heart both at the same time— it is a revelation. It’s not something that comes from any external source; but it is my own spirit and the voice of God revealing these things to me, unfolding them, rolling them out of a silken cloth at my feet. And I smile.”
― C. JoyBell C.

Now…shed what doesn’t belong, reveal what does. Shine a light on it. And watch yourself bloom and grow and triumph. =)





Brad Pitt. Beyonce. Angelina Jolie. Marilyn Monroe. Heck, Barack Obama. All of them have something in common. They are magnetic! Like them or not, we can’t take our eyes off of them.

The term charisma has two definitions: (1) compelling attractiveness or charm that can inspire devotion in others, (2) a divinely conferred power or talent.

I am going to give it a third definition. Charisma: crazy sexy hotness. So how do you get there? Well it isn’t by doing 150 ab crunches a day or by spending hundreds of dollars on professional blonde highlights. (Though those things feel pretty great too!) What I am talking about is completely attainable for everyone reading this. Because you see charisma, or crazy sexy hotness, isn’t about how you look. It’s about you feel; how you feel about YOURSELF and how that feeling inspires others to feel about you. It’s a ripple effect. How YOU feel shoots out a special energy that touches other people and influences their feelings about you. If you beam out a negative energy, they will feel negative around you. If you beam out positivity, self-assurance, love and light, that is exactly what you will bring forth from them. How cool and powerful is that?! How people are attracted to you is a direct result of the energetic messages you are beaming out in their direction. Here are 4 things you need to emanate that awesome, attractive energy that makes you irresistible.

1.    A PASSION- Years and years ago when I was working in theatre and choreographing a show, I was telling my boyfriend at the time how excited I was about the project. He said “I love when  you talk about this. Your whole face lights up and your eyes literally sparkle and shine.” (Looking back, WOW he was cute!) The point is when we have something we feel passionate about, our face truly does look brighter. There is a spark in our eyes and a zest and intensity that pour out of us and that’s hot! What do you LOVE? What makes you feel that rush of energy running through your veins?  Message it sends: I am capable of intense rapture and devotion….everywhere. 😉

 2.    A GOAL- We all need a purpose. Something we are fired up about and moving towards. Something that revs up our engine and fuels our souls. We need to have work that doesn’t feel like work. Friday night with no plans? Great! It gives you a chance to spend time with your vision, working towards your desired outcome.  Nothing is more boring than when we ask someone what’s new, and in return we get a shrug, an empty stare and a “not much. Get a goal; the kind that you lose yourself in. The kind of goal that is so exciting to you that you cannot stop planning for it.    Message it sends: I am never bored (or boring) because I have something AWESOME going on.  And you will want to be a part of it.  

 3.    BOUNDLESS RANDOM LOVE- Hold up. I’m not talking one night stands with random bartenders. What I am talking about is choosing to love every single person you encounter, knowing deep down that you are divinely connected to them in some way. Sometimes when I am just walking down the street and I pass someone I will find myself wondering what moves them. Are they happy? Struggling? Feeling “less than?”  I will quietly bless them, silently say “I love you.”  It feels incredible to be filled with that much love for everyone and everything around you. It makes people feel good in your presence. That same old boyfriend nick named me “Bell.” He said it was because when I walked into a room it was as though a bell rang, and everyone woke up and gravitated towards me. (Maybe I should have held onto him 😉 Message it sends: I have boundless rivers of love within me and therefore, an endless amount to give. In my presence you will feel forever loved and special.  (And who doesn’t want that?!)

 4.    YOUR LITTLE BOOK OF RULES– Know thyself. To thine own self be true… The guys who wrote all that were on to something. Who in the heck are you? What do you stand for? What are your values? What are your non-negotiable needs and expectations? What will you NEVER tolerate? Answer those questions for yourself and hold fast to the answers. When you get comfortable with your rules, and live by them as guidebook, your confidence will soar.  I had no confidence at all growing up. I had no idea what I wanted or what I stood for. I spent many many years watching my friends go on dates while I sat home with my parents. But in my late 20’s something shifted. I began to love myself. I learned my answers to the questions above and I never wavered.  I also never sat home again on a weekend! You see when you know exactly what you want, don’t want, what you always expect and never tolerate a few different things will happen. The opposite sex will be grateful that you’ve removed the tiresome guessing game and they will be inspired by your sense of identity in such a way that they will openly communicate theirs. Message it sends: I know who I am. And who I am ROCKS. And you cannot help but want to dig deep and find out more.

So there you have it.  Four steps to a sexier you. What’s great about these is that it doesn’t matter how bad of a hair day you’re having, or much money you’ve lost or how many pounds you’ve put on. These four steps are totally within your power. Use them. Feel them. Live by them. And watch the love roll in! 😉




See Ya Later Alligator – How to Detach From the Dream Crushers!


Let’s face it. We’ve all got them in our lives.

The nay-sayers. The dream-stealers. Those who never have a positive word to say about anything. Ever.

Sure, they may be well meaning—and they may even claim that they only want to “protect you” or save you from something they fear will hurt you. But is their “concern” really warranted? Is it even valid?

Most dreamers would respond with a resounding NO!

After all, we are entrepreneurs, trailblazers, and we get fired up about new ideas and the endless possibilities for our lives. We love to explore new ways of being. We get excited about building relationships with other dreamers, and we’re inspired to push past the limitations that others just readily accept.

So why do these negative types feel so compelled to harsh our mellow? (I’ve always wanted to say “harsh our mellow” 😉

To answer that, we first need to understand the mindset of the limited thinker.

In most cases, the limited thinker is a chronic worrier or complainer who has never attempted to change their lot in life—and they are determined to drag you down to their level because that is all they know. They find it hard (if not impossible) to be supportive of your bright ideas, big goals and bold thinking because they’ve never experienced these for themselves. The truth of the matter is that they simply lack the insight to see beyond their own struggles.

But this does NOT have to become your problem!

Mark Twain had this to say about negative people:

“Keep away from people who try to belittle your ambitions. Small people always do that, but the really great make you feel that you too can become great.”

In order to move confidently towards your dreams, you need to create the space for positive change to occur. Being in relationships with toxic people and allowing their negative energy into your life will only hold you back from manifesting opportunities for your success. You can love them, you just can’t allow yourself to be swayed by them. Conversely, when you release these dream-stealers from your life, you open up a space for positive people to enter. These are the ones who support your vision and will encourage you to pursue your dreams.

Follow these steps to rid yourself of toxic people.

Identify The Offenders

Toxic people have a knack for bringing your energy down.

They leave you doubting yourself and feeling drained.

Learn to spot the difference between someone who is sharing their struggles (healthy) and someone who constantly complains (unhealthy). Those who are genuinely struggling are willing to listen to constructive feedback and are open to change. On the other hand, complainers have no desire to change and are not receptive to feedback. They simply want you to feel sorry for them.

Toxic people delight in shooting down your ideas and questioning what you are trying to do. Usually they suffer from self-doubt, fear and insecurity—and they are simply projecting this on you. They love you, they worry about you, and their intentions aren’t malicious. Yet their very presence in your life can have a drastic effect on your success and perspective if you aren’t careful.

Let Them Go

There are several ways to do this. You can choose to ignore their calls or avoid being in places where you might bump into them. You don’t owe them an explanation for your behavior—unless you want to provide one. Usually, the negative person is not in the frame of mind to listen to what you have to say anyway, so save your breath-and your energy. When you do release them, do it with love. Tell them that you’d be willing to rekindle the relationship when they’re ready to be more positive and supportive. If a total release isn’t possible (the offender is your husband, mother, child etc.) simply build a force field of peace around yourself. Let them have their say, just don’t let it pass your force field. You don’t have to attend every argument you are invited to. It is possible to send them love and compassion, being completely cognizant that their limited vision is part of their journey, and simply not absorb the limiting energy. Force fields activated!

Stand Up For Your Dreams

You need to believe that you are worthy of achieving your goals—and becoming the person you want to be. Letting go of the nay-sayers will let you get there a lot faster. If you don’t let go of these relationships, you’ll be stuck in the same place, spinning your wheels and going nowhere. Ask yourself who in your life is supporting you and encouraging you. Spend as much time as you can with like-minded people. Hold on to your big vision and move forward with faith and courage. Your dreams will meet you there!

What Are You Afraid Of?


Everyone gets scared. Even the most spiritual, successful people we know face their moments of fear. The key is to not be defined by your fear, but rather by your mastery of it. Below are my favorite quotes about conquering fear as you move towards your dreams. =)

“I will not die an unlived life. I will not live in fear of falling or catching fire. I choose to inhabit my days, to allow my living to open me, to make me less afraid, more accessible, to loosen my heart until it becomes a wing, a torch, a promise. I choose to risk my significance; to live so that which comes to me as seed goes to the next as blossom and that which comes to me as blossom, goes on as fruit.”
— Dawna Markova

“The amateur believes he must first overcome his fear; then he can do his work. The professional knows that fear can never be overcome. He knows there is no such thing as a fearless warrior or a dread-free artist.” –Steven Pressfield

“It is not because things are difficult that we do not dare, it is because we do not dare that they are difficult.”
― Seneca

“Thinking will not overcome fear but action will.” –W. Clement Stone

“Courage is not the absence of fear, but rather the judgment that something else is more important than fear.” –Ambrose Redmoon

“Decide that you want it more than you are afraid of it.” –Bill Cosby

“Life shrinks or expands in proportion to one’s courage”- Anais Nin

“Never be afraid to try something new. Remember, amateurs built the ark, professionals built the Titanic”—Unknown

“We’re in a freefall into future. We don’t know where we are going. Things are changing so fast and always when you’re going through a long tunnel, anxiety comes along. And all you have to do to transform your hell into a paradise is to turn your fall into a voluntary act. It’s a very interesting shift of perspective and that’s all it is… joyful participation in the sorrows and everything changes.”—Joseph Campbell.

“Feed your faith and your fears will starve to death.” – unknown

How Big Is Your BUT?

We’ve all been there. You get inspired. Something lights you up, you begin to see your dreams as though they are right in front of you and suddenly you feel completely unstoppable. Then, all of the sudden, your feelings change. Your shoulders slump. You begin to feel heavy and soon, all of your beautiful visions are replaced with visions of hardship and insurmountable obstacles.
That voice you heard that said, ‘YES! You can do this!” switches to a deeper voice, a voice you don’t invite but one that somehow always finds its way in. It’s the voice of the annoying occupants in your mind I like to call “Mr. and Mrs. Yeah But.”
Mr. and Mrs. Yeah But always pop in right when you’re feeling unstoppable just to remind you of your perceived limitations. I say “perceived” because you have no limitations. But you’ve heard them right? Your soul starts to soar and pretty soon you hear “yeah but you never succeeded in the past.” “Yeah But do you know how much money that will cost?” “Yeah but what if you do this and it doesn’t work out?”
There’s another name for this voice—Resistance. Resistance is dangerous. Resistance is strong and sneaky. If you don’t learn to recognize it, it will keep you stuck for years. It will lie to you and tell you that it’s keeping you safe and smart. It’s true colors will only be revealed when you are at rock bottom or nearly out of time. You don’t have to let it get that far. You are stronger than resistance once you know what to look for. Here are some ways you can recognize when resistance is messing with your mind:

 Any mental chatter that pops into your mind to remind you of how hard something might be- that’s resistance. The universe is unlimited, therefore YOU are unlimited. There is no degree of difficulties in miracles. Those limitations are created by one thing— Resistance.
 Any time you know exactly what you should be doing, but instead procrastinate by convincing yourself that other things must be done… like Instagram-ing your latest meal or tweeting about your ex.. that’s resistance. Get back to work.’
 Any time you find yourself pulling excuses out of the air to justify your lack of progress—I don’t have the money, there just aren’t enough clients out there, I don’t have time to put into a program- that’s the yeah buts. That’s resistance.

So what do you do? How do you send the “yeah buts” packing? Simple. Act. Do SOMETHING. Resistance hates inspired action. Nothing gets under resistance’s skin more than you showing it just how persistent you can be. Once you know how to recognize it, it loses its power over you. Once you show it that you cannot be distracted, or discouraged, or stopped, it will show up less and less.
ACT. Leap. Soar. Move with unwavering faith in the direction of your dreams as though you’ve seen a crystal ball and know with certainty that success is imminent. Resistance will take notice and steer clear. And when it tries to get in? You’ll be ready. You’ll laugh in its face, driving forward with courage and confidence, with a calm knowing that nothing is more powerful than a determined soul. =)

Ready to take it to the next level? Want to learn exactly how I went from miserable and poor to happy and abundant? Join me and the other trailblazers for Soul Success 360. Starts THIS WEEK and closes until July. Grab your spot now. Just click on the “Work With Me” tab on the menu and we’ll get you started!

Hi. I’m Fear. I Came to Make You Broke and Unhappy.


Something has really been bothering me. It is keeping me at night. That something….is your dream.  What’s bothering me is how many people are living halfway, on autopilot and will never realize how much time they have wasted until their time has nearly run out. SO many of you have a dream. You have a passion. You have gifts to share and people you’ve never met who desperately need you. Yet you stay covered.

There is no worse feeling than regret.  There is nothing more crushing than the knowledge that life is short and that you’ve squandered it away. You can wish, or you can act. You can wonder what life might have been like, or you can make it the way you dreamed it could be.

I am amazed at how many people contact me, sit with me, talk to me, share their journey with tears in their eyes and longing in their hearts. I hear them, I feel their pain and confusion. They are lost, feeling like time is wasting away, unsure of the next steps but certain that they cannot go on one more day in their current reality of anxiety, uncertainty or financial strain. They want more.

So we paint a brighter picture. They tell me what they want. As they talk, they light up. They begin to picture their new life. They see themselves at peace, healthy, abundant, with clear goals and a blue print for reaching them. Their faces change as they imagine a life that is joyful and fulfilling. They feel the warmth of having more control, more time, more freedom, more money. They are whole with the fulfillment that washes over them as they see their new life. And then the meeting is over. Real life resumes. And they vanish.    I never hear from them again. Fear crept in and replaced their fire with self-doubt and skepticism.  I had one woman who couldn’t afford to coach with me one on one. I respected the fact that the median income in her country was drastically different from mine.  In fact, one month of coaching with me was MORE than the average monthly income in the rural, poverty stricken country she lived in. So I offered a major discount and customized payment plan. I offered several free resources. I made it impossible for her to refuse because after speaking with her, I could feel the difference she would make for people. But she bailed. She said if it were meant to be, she would be able to afford the regular price. If it were meant to be, her internet connection would be better. If it were meant to be I would live closer to her… I handed her a gift, and fear whispered to her “Don’t take it! It might work and then you would have to change!”

How many times have you talked yourself out of your own dream?

Let me say this as gently as I can. I’ll be just fine. Whether you take a step or not, plenty of people will. So I’ll be ok.

But what will happen to YOU?

Well? Where do you stand? Will you be counted amongst the skeptics? The fearful? The people who say that life is hard and that success is impossible? Or will you be counted among the visionaries, the trailblazers, the beautiful creative souls who leap and soar and CHANGE?

Watch this video. It is 6 minutes of your life. This video is circulating through the most powerful groups I know. It embodies the mindset I want each and every one of you to embrace. It is the core of my work and my program.

You have to be willing to go after your dream. You have to invest in yourself and your future. You get one life. If you want MORE for yours, get in Soul Success while you still can. We close the doors in one week and don’t open them again until July. Here are the details.

Soul Success 360

This isn’t about marketing. If you think that this push is all about ME, then you need this program more than ever. Lift the veil, look in the mirror, take the reigns and “man up”! Get responsible. Get what’s YOURS!

Make it your year. I believe in you!




P.S. Enroll this week and get the entire Made for Money Interview series for FREE! 26 audios from the best and brightest. Priceless advice and millionaire mindset tips. Awesome!



I’ve Met My Inner Voice. And She Rocks.


Call it what you want—Inner Voice, Intuition, the Voice of the Infinite. We all have it. The problem is that most people coast through life never getting to know it. And when you don’t know it, don’t listen to it, don’t attempt to connect with it, you miss out on an endless flowing river of power and purpose direct from the God of your understanding.

Every once in a while, my awesome mentor Shanda Sumpter mentions a book she’s currently loving. And she’s never steered me wrong. Most recently she was singing the praises of Russ Whitney’s Inner Voice. That same day, I came across a blog post by Larry Benet and guess what? He was recommending the same book. I don’t need to be told three times. I immediately ordered my copy. But I wasn’t prepared.

Russ Whitney doesn’t just share his own incredible journey to the center of his Inner Voice, he fully expects you to walk with him. You’ve got work to do. The kind of work that when you finally get through it, you wonder why you waited so long. And unlike a lot of books that tell you what to do and then send you out to pasture, Russ gives you a blue print. And if you look at that blue print and it feels just a bit too overwhelming, he hands you an inner voice coach to guide you through it. This is more than a book. It’s an engaged community. It’s a movement; a way of life.

Inner Voice takes us through the four stages we pass through here on earth. It teaches us HOW to make two-way conscious contact with our inner voice, which is, in essence, one of the more beautiful and productive ways to learn and to pray.

This journey is not for the faint of heart. This is for the courageous souls who aren’t at all afraid of a detour into a dark forest, because they know it’s a short cut to paradise. By way of Russ’s ——— you will turn back time and revisit your past. I get it. A visit to the past isn’t always rainbows and butterflies. But it’s in our past that our limiting and false beliefs were formed so it’s there that we must go to smash through them!

Every once in a while you meet someone and feel instantly blessed. And that is exactly how I felt when I first had the opportunity to speak with Russ. This is a man who amassed a huge fortune, sat at the helm of Fortune 500 companies and then hit rock bottom only to rise again, this time as the most authentic version of himself, sharing his wisdom from a place of humble service but with that same passion and enthusiasm that we are used to from Russ Whitney. Grab a copy. Get to know him. And more importantly, get to know yourself.

You Have Just Been Appointed CEO


It’s true. I’ve just appointed you CEO of You, Inc. So from now on you will need to make your decisions accordingly. I have given so many clients this advice and it is a game changer for them! Why? Because as unglamorous and chilly as it sounds, life is kind of like a company. You have the bosses, the employees, the mission and the message, the bottom line, the strategic planning, the SWOT analysis (assessing strengths, weaknesses, opportunities and threats) and even employee appreciation days. You have all of those things in your life.

As CEO of your company (aka your life) you have incredible freedom and perks. You get to decide who you trust and enjoy enough to hire (bring into your life). You get to decide who is no longer serving the company and must be let go. You get to make the one year plan, the company mission statement, the workshops, and you are responsible for employee morale.
I used to be a “yes man.” I said yes to everything, whether I wanted to do it or not. And what would invariably happen is that as the obligation drew near, I would get more and more irritated, maybe even start to resent the person I had agreed to help or meet and the energy of the day would plummet. I was just trying to please everyone so my intentions were coming from a place of purity and service. But it’s ok to consider YOUR best interests. Any competent CEO would. Let me tell you a very short story about the day I became the CEO of Gina, Inc.

I had been invited to dinner. I really didn’t want to go as it was a group of people I had grown apart from and I was no longer comfortable in their company. The night of the dinner came. It was dark, rainy, my youngest child was sick, I wasn’t feeling 100%, my husband ended up working late so I was scrambling to find child care and with every passing hour that the dinner approached I was more and more irritable. But then something clicked. I went into CEO mode. I thought to myself “This is absurd. This is MY life. MY time. Time is the only resource that I can never replenish and I should get to decide how I want to spend every delicious hour of it!” I called the person who had organized the dinner and respectfully said, “Unfortunately I am not going to be able to make it. My family needs me tonight.” Period. End of story. No fake excuses. No contrived apology. This particular dinner was not in the best interest of my company or my staff (my home and my family.) I can’t tell you the amazing feeling of freedom you will feel when you no longer have to dream up excuses.

This is YOUR time. Your life. And sure you want to be in service and there will be times you have to honor an obligation. But how many hours of your time have you given to the draining friend who keeps you on the phone for hours lamenting their dramatic love life? (When really the time clock was ticking and your company’s billable time would be better spent on a growth task?) How many hours have you spent at a monthly book club that you no longer enjoy at ALL? How many hours have you spent trying to preserve a friendship that had run its course, emailing back and forth, feeling misunderstood and unheard but hesitant to pull the plug? It’s perfectly ok, and I would argue imperative to your self-worth, to make decisions firmly and proclaim them confidently. And most people will respect you for it. The ones who don’t will never be invited to join your company and they will miss out on the stock options, the perks and the company Christmas party. =)